FMB Hetalia Crack!
by ApSk
Summary: A crack-tastic Flying mint bunny Kingdom and USUK story with slight Franada. With King Flying Mint bunny,Queen Francis, Prince Alfred, Princess Arthur. I was bored one day REALLY REALLY REALLY bored. GET EXITED CAUSE IT'S GONNA GET WEIRD!


The flying mint bunny Kingdom

Once upon there lived a Prince named Alfred. Alfred Lived on Hamburger Street in a giant castle made of hamburgers. Alfred had an alpaca named Allen. One day The American decided to go out and find himself a princess. So he hopped on his trusty Alpaca grabbed his trusty Canadian pancake juggling jester Matthew. They headed out for the search for a princess.

After a few hours of traveling the duo came to the flying mint bunny kingdom. This kingdom was run by king Flying mint bunny and his queen Francis. Alfred hopped of his steed and stormed into the castle.

"Okay dude I'm here to court a princess! Nahahahaha!" Exclaimed the hamburger prince loudly.

The loud American stormed up to the king's throne. Fallowed by the timid jester. The jester immediately peaked the queen's interest.

"So you wish to marry my princess?" Asked the mint colored rabbit.

"Yeah pretty much flying mint dude" said the prince with a nod of his head.

"THEN YOU'LL HAVE TO FACE MY EXPERT SAMURAI ROMANO!" yelled Flying mint bunny king.

With that Romano came out sword drawn. The queen took this opportunity to sneak into the back room with the jester in claims of "safety". The Italian charged the Hamburger prince whom had promptly pulled out his royal mace and sprayed it into the samurai's face. Romano dropped his weapon hissing inwardly in pain. Hands immediately brought up to his face to try and soothe the burning.

"AYE MAN! FUCK THIS! THIS BASTARD WITH MACE, MACE? WHAT KIND OF A GROWN ASS MAN CARRIES MACE LIKE A LITTLE BITCH? DON'T CHICKS CARRY THAT AROUND TO PREVENT RAPE AND SHIT? IF THAT'S WHY YOU GOT IT THEN THAT WAS A WASTE OF MONEY CAUSE YOUR FUCKED UP FACE IS DOING IT FOR YOU! AND THIS BASTARD! FLYING MINT BUNNY? MAN YOUR MADRE MUST HAVE BEEN FUCKED UP TO GIVE YOU THAT NAME GODDAMNIT THIS THING BE FLYING AROUND AND SHIT, AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON YOUR ''WIFE" SHE TRIED TO TOUCH MY ASS THE OTHER DAY... AND WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH THAT LAUGH? OHONHONHONHONHON...SHIT SOUNDS RETARTED OH, BY THEY WAY, TELL THE PRINCESS TO STAY OUT OF THE KITCHEN CAUSE WE ALL KNOW THE BITCH CAN'T COOK FOR SHIT! FUCK YOU! FUCK HIM! IM DONE!" Yelled the angry young man.

With that he left. Strangely enough his boyfriend Antonio was outside dressed up like a matador on the back of a giant turtle. The occupants of the room stared at each other in confusion. The queen staring mostly at his new crush. As they snuck back into the room together clothes and hair slightly disheveled. The pair's clothes looked as if they'd been removed and then put back on in a hurry.

"Oooookaaaaay?" questioned a confused Alfred.

"Well you've earned the right to marry my beloved princess," Said the king. "ARTHUR!"

The British boy came to his fathers call today he was sporting an outfit similar to Princess beach from Mario.

"Y-Yes father?" Asked Princess Arthur eyeing the taller blonde up and down.

"This is your new fiancée Alfred…your name is Alfred right?"

"Yeah dude" The hamburger prince gave a nervous smile at the princess.

"It's nice to meet you Alfred I'm Arthur" He smiled.

"ALRIGHT LET THE WEDDING COMMENCE!" Exclaimed Flying mint bunny as he clapped his paws together.

The wedding went pretty smooth minus the large argument between the reigning king and queen and the "kidnap" of the jester.

"Isn't it beautiful my queen? Perhaps we should celebrate later tonight ;)" whispered the king into the queens ear.

"Oui about that… you see I want a divorce!" demanded Francis.

"B-but why my love?"

"There's some one else" He turned his head to the side.

"Who!?"

"Mathew"

"The…jester? A JESTER! You're leaving me for a jester? Why!?"

"Because at least he does not have to compensate for a small queue and "make love to me overly hard! ALSO HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY FREAKY FETISHES!" with that Francis stormed out grabbing Matthews's hand and taking him with.

The wedding on Alfred and Arthur's part was pretty good. Hamburgers and tea were served for dinner and the two began to speak and they found an attraction and suddenly they didn't mind barley knowing one another. The princess didn't even notices her parents split up and Alfred didn't notice his missing brother.

They had a sweet night of passionate butt sex THE END!


End file.
